One of the most puzzling aspects of mental health recovery is that sometimes, as you start to improve, you may actually feel worse.
This paradox is more common than you might think and understanding it will help you maintain progress.
Three key reasons why this happens:
1. The Fear of Progress
When you've been at rock bottom for a long time, it becomes familiar territory. As you start to feel better, you suddenly have something to lose. This newfound hope, while positive, can feel fragile and scary. The fear of losing progress can be paralyzing.
Moreover, as others notice your improvement, their expectations may rise, adding pressure that makes you want to retreat to your familiar low place.
2. Lifestyle Creep
As your mental health improves, you naturally take on more responsibilities. Your life becomes busier and more complex. While this is a sign of progress, it can also mean that your overall stress levels remain high or even increase, despite your improving mental state.
3. The Challenge of Letting Go
Recovery often requires leaving behind unhealthy coping mechanisms or relationships that once provided comfort. This process of letting go, even of things that weren't good for you, can be surprisingly difficult and may trigger feelings of loss or nostalgia.
What can you do:
1. Practice Sitting with Discomfort:
The fear of getting better is like any other fear – it gets easier with exposure. Try to sit with those uncomfortable feelings of hope and progress. They'll get less scary over time.
2. Pace Yourself:
You don't have to make up for lost time all at once. It's okay to take it slow and build a sustainable life.
3. Acknowledge the Grief:
Recognize that it's normal to feel sad about leaving certain things behind, even if those things weren't great for you. True healing happens with a combination of expression and time.
4. Manage Expectations:
Remember, setbacks are normal. If you do crash, you already know how to survive rock bottom. You've done it before, you can do it again if you need to.
5. Celebrate Small Wins:
Focus on the progress you're making, even if it doesn't feel amazing yet. It's amazing how these tiny changes can affect you.
Getting better isn't always a straight line upward. It's messy, it's complicated, and sometimes it feels worse before it feels better.
- Scott
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