Some days, existence feels like a chore, and admitting that can be tough. I know our brains are inconsistent and illogical, which makes life challenging. But acknowledging these feelings doesn't mean giving up.
I used to feel this way all the time. Not just exhausted or unmotivated, but completely indifferent to my own life. It wasn’t dramatic, it wasn’t loud—it was just a dull, empty nothingness. Like the world kept going, but I had checked out. And the hardest part? I didn’t know how to fix it.
Over time, I found a way forward—not a cure, but a way to make things more manageable. It’s not about snapping out of it or “thinking positively.” It’s about learning to function even when you don’t feel like it. Three things helped me get here, and maybe they can help you, too.
Stop Living Only for Yourself
I stopped living only for myself. That doesn’t mean ignoring my needs, but when depression makes it impossible to care about myself, I need something outside of me to keep me anchored. That could be a person, a cause, a pet—something that still matters even when my emotions are unpredictable. Depression has a way of making you feel disconnected from your own life, but oddly enough, it doesn’t always sever the connection to others. Even when I felt nothing for myself, I could still care about my kids, my work, my community. Having those external ties made all the difference.
Keep Going Without Immediate Reward
I trained myself to keep going even when there’s no immediate reward. We’re wired to seek gratification—whether it’s a sense of accomplishment, happiness, or connection. But when depression dulls those feelings, it’s easy to stop trying altogether. I had to learn to push through, to trust that even if I couldn’t feel the benefit in the moment, I would later. The feelings always come back, but only if I keep doing the things that allow them to return.
Don’t Make Decisions Based Purely on Emotion
I stopped making decisions based purely on emotion—or the absence of it. There were times when I felt nothing, and that nothingness tried to convince me that my life was empty and meaningless. But I learned that feelings aren’t always facts. If I had made permanent decisions based on temporary emotional states, I would have wrecked relationships, abandoned things that mattered, and walked away from the life I actually wanted. Now, I don’t let my emotions alone drive my choices. I take them into account, but I don’t let them dictate my reality.
These aren’t magic fixes. They don’t make hard days disappear. But they do make them more manageable. They create a foundation strong enough to stand on when everything else feels shaky. And over time, those moments of emptiness become fewer and further between.
I have talked more about how I moved through these feelings and found a way to keep going in the video below.
-Scott
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