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4 “Toxic” Behaviors That Improved My Mental Health

The word toxic gets thrown around a lot these days. But not everything labeled toxic is actually bad.


Some coping strategies that get dismissed or judged have done more for my mental health than most of the “approved” ones ever did.


I’ve lived in that headspace—where things on paper are fine, but my brain says otherwise. There were days when I’d wake up with this gut-deep sense that I was failing at life, even when everything around me said I wasn’t. And some of the tools that helped me climb out of that place? They’ve been called “toxic.”


These aren't the kinds of approaches you'd see in a self-help book or hear in therapy all the time. They challenge popular wellness advice. But they’ve enhanced my emotional stability and daily functioning in a real, measurable way—because they work with my brain chemistry, not against it.


Here are four so-called “toxic” behaviors I’ve fully embraced—because they’ve made me mentally stronger, not weaker.


Don’t validate all emotions


We’re told to validate every emotion. I get it. But not all feelings are worthy of a spotlight. When your brain doesn’t always process things clearly—maybe because of depression, anxiety, or a mood disorder—some feelings show up that just aren't based in reality.

I’ve had mornings where it felt like my life was a disaster. But when I zoomed out, nothing external had changed. That wasn’t truth—it was neurotransmitters misfiring. And in those moments, I’ve had to look myself in the mirror and say, “No. That’s not real. We’re not going to entertain that today.”


That’s not denial. That’s self-protection. That’s me not letting a temporary distortion destroy the good I’ve built.


Working Straight Through Isn’t Always Self-Sabota


The world says take frequent breaks. But here’s what I’ve learned about myself: once I stop, I don’t want to start again. Breaks don’t always refresh me—they interrupt momentum.

So instead, I work in long blocks. Not just at my job, but in life—fitness, housework, and creative projects. Then I hit a hard stop. After that, I’m done for the day. No more guilt. No more pressure. Just peace.


I know that structure might look like burnout waiting to happen. But it’s actually what keeps me from burning out. Because when I’m in motion, I stay in motion. And when I rest, I really rest.


Putting Yourself First Isn’t Selfish—It’s Strategic


There’s this idea that caring for yourself is indulgent. That you should always put others before yourself. But I’ve learned that the people I care about most don’t want a version of me who’s running on fumes.


My wife and kids don’t benefit from a Scott who’s exhausted and emotionally flat. My clients don’t either. So I make time to move my body, eat decent food, get enough sleep. Not because I think I’m more important—but because I want to show up for the people who matter.


Quality over quantity. Always.


Physical Exercise as Therapy


When I say the gym is my therapy, I don’t mean instead of therapy. I mean it’s part of how I manage my mind.


Without physical activity, I get foggy, irritable, and unfocused. It’s not just about fitness—it’s about function. My brain works better when my body moves. That’s not bro-science—it’s real, studied, and felt in my day-to-day life.


You don’t need to be perfect to feel better. You don’t need a flawless routine, or total balance, or anyone else’s approval. You just need to figure out what works for you—even if it goes against the grain.


In the video below, I talk about 4 controversial yet transformative mental health practices that could help you find stability and how traditionally "toxic" behaviors might become powerful tools for your healing journey.



-Scott

 

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